Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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