I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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