She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
