I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Randomize
