Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Welp...herpes.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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