I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
