Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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