Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
