drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
