Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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