sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
