She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
