i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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