Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
