I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
