I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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