So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
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