Grow some girl-balls and come out already
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
