"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
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