OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
