She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
