my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
