In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
