you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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