A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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