Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Couch. On fire.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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