Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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