I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
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