think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
