I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
