brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
The air taste purple.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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