Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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