she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
