I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.