I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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