I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
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