Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
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