I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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