There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
