I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
