dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
It was like giving head to a cactus.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
