omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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