He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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