question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
he was CRYING into my vagina
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
