...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.