Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
