I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
