I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I have fence marks all over my body
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Randomize
