How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I'm like, not good at living.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
