just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
