A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
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